Church on Time

I was disappointed when Russ had to work early on Sunday. I had been planning on going to church and looking forward to it after my Saturday plans had completely fallen apart. If you read my last blog, you're familiar with my routine and understand why the thought of taking "little man" out to church by myself was so daunting, I didn't even consider it as an option. It was my mother who suggested I take him after I complained about not being able to go.

I hadn't attempted to take him out by myself yet. There are the dogs to take outside and get settled beforehand. There is the fact I have to carry him and the car seat down the stairs (I am currently in physical therapy for an abdominal condition/injury as a result of pregnancy), and the idea of getting myself, him, and the diaper bag ready all at once is pretty overwhelming.

I'd have to sit near the back of the church. I'd have to sit on the end. I'd have to get there early and be prepared to get up and leave quickly if he started screaming (he does that sometimes when he's wet).
I managed to shower, dress, change him, dress him and get the dogs squared away. I checked the time.  There was 15 minutes left to get to the church - away we went.

He started to fuss in the car when we were still a block away and I said out loud, "This is not a good sign. We're not even there yet." I started to sing:

"Gets me to the church on time, 

(church on time) terrifies me

(church on time) makes me party

(church on time) puts my trust in God and man..." (From David Bowie's Modern Love)

He settled down and we even got there in time! To my amazement he sat quietly all the way through the mass (even after the Gospel when I knew he had dirtied his diaper). The priest Blessed him when I brought him up to communion with me.

I had been fairly self conscious the whole time. I didn't notice any other infants there. It was a new church I'd only been to a few times. Maybe they didn't bring babies here. No one seemed to be giving me odd looks. I didn't want to shake hands during the Sign of Peace because I had to keep my hands sanitized in order to keep putting his pacifier back in his mouth and the lady behind me kept coughing. What would people think of me when I just nodded and said "Peace be with you" instead of extending my hand? He was seated in his carseat in the aisle next to me and I wondered if people would judge me for that. Maybe there was some section for children that I was clearly not in. The funny thing is that the Gospel and Homily were all about not judging a book by its cover. (Smile) The priest told this story about an Indian king who was snubbed at a Rolls Royce dealership while dressed in plain clothes and his reaction, and he encouraged us all to better manage our blindspots:

Click here for story: "Indian King Snubbed at Rolls Royce..."

After mass, a lady came up to me and asked if I needed a ride home. I said, "No, that's ok - we drove." She said she had noticed the baby all bundled up and that I had a backpack and thought I might have walked. I explained, "No, it's just the first time that I'm bringing him anywhere by myself and so I brought everything." She smiled. She had three boys of her own and by the third one, she "only brought the bare minimum of essentials." Too funny! I was all worried about what people would think, the Homily's message was all about not judging, and the nice lady asked if I needed a ride.

It's true. We all do it. What if instead of judging, we ask questions (like the nice lady after church). What if we get to know other instead of just going with our assumptions?

OK. Will do.

Namaste, 

T

Great Expectations

When I set out for church on Sunday morning, I fully expected to be inspired and positively energized there. It's not often that I say this but... church was a disappointment.

The priest started off his sermon by asking that any latecomers please remain in the back or wait until there was a hymn to seat themselves, so as not to "interrupt the whole atmosphere." I thought the priest himself interrupted the atmosphere by calling it to everyone's attention, and wondered briefly if he was talking about me. I had been there before the start of mass and since it hadn't started yet, had gone to find a restroom. When I returned, the congregation was singing and I didn't think anyone minded me walking up to a pew that had an empty seat on the end. However, that had been a good twenty minutes earlier and he was probably now speaking about people who were standing in the back at that particular time. It didn't matter who he was talking about though. I thought that it must have made a fair amount of people feel uncomfortable and I found his comments a bit unsettling.

The priest then launched into his homily, which had much to do with suffering and pain. I may not be giving him enough credit here, but the whole point of it seemed to be that we must suffer like Jesus and that pain is everywhere. I looked around to see if anyone else besides me found his message odd. If they did, they didn't show it. All the people were listening attentively.

He quoted something in some other language, then offered a translation. I believe he credited Buddha, but I might have misinterpreted due to his thick accent. I could have sworn he quoted Buddha as having said, "Pain and suffering is everywhere." WHAT WAS HE TALKING ABOUT???

I wanted to get up and leave. As luck would have it, I had to use the restroom again. (Never drink an entire bottle of water just before leaving the house for church.) I waited for a part of the mass when I felt I wouldn't be "interrupting the whole atmosphere" before I left my pew. The mass ended and the people were almost completely gone when I returned. The priest was shaking hands with congregants as they exited the church. His message also encouraged people to stand up for their beliefs and speak their mind (regardless of the suffering it might cause). I was tempted to stand up for my beliefs and tell him how much I disliked his sermon, but I resisted and exited through a different doorway.

I understand where he could have gone with his point... He was talking about sacrificing for others and I could relate to that idea. He could have talked about how joyous and rewarding it is to give selflessly to others. He didn't. He said we must sacrifice and suffer for the good of others. He made it sound like a miserable thing that we would have to endure.

I went home and conveyed my experience to Russ, who was getting ready to leave for a flight. We were stopping by his parents' house for a Father's Day visit before the airport. On the way we passed a McDonald's. I asked him to pull over.

I didn't want to stop for food. What caught my attention was the marquee in front. I was surprised, excited and nourished by it! It said, "The purpose of our lives is to be happy." (HA! and HA again!) I exclaimed, "I could've come HERE for spiritual guidance this morning!" Kudos to the manager of that McDonald's!

It's funny how you can find disappointment where you least expect it - and inspiration where you least expect it too. :)

Namaste,
T

P.S.

While writing this, I tried to find Buddha quotes having anything to do with pain or suffering. Here are a few that I found which run totally contrary to sentiments expressed at Sunday's service: