After packing up for Zach, Bentley and myself, driving hundreds of miles, cleaning, power washing, grocery shopping, cooking, fixing things, executing events & day trips, kayaking, biking, cleaning again, clearing trails through the woods, repacking, hitching up the trailer, driving hundreds of miles again (while learning songs for a show), unhitching and unloading, watering the plants, walking the dog and TRYING to catch up on social media a little bit... that's really all I got. I'm fried.
I took a nap.
Gentle reminder for everyone that sometimes we need a day off.
I don't really get days off. Anyone know this commercial?
Maybe I can manage that much - a calming bath.
LOL and cry... mom life does not stop.
Love you all! Please take some time to recharge when you need. The world will keep turning and you will be stronger for it.
You might just as easily gasp and exclaim, "WHERE ARE THEIR MASKS?! How could they put everyone else in danger like that!?" and get mad as hell.
Meanwhile... after trying to record our next little family video without success and a series of other frustrations, we needed a mental health break.
It had been our second or third day's attempt at recording the new song for a variety of reasons, some of which I have chosen to forget, including someone needing ice for a bumped head, the screeching of nonsense words instead of lyrics or pleasant sounds, phone storage running out of space and/or a toy piano crashing to the floor. You get the idea.
It was "one of those days" when nothing was going smoothly and everything turned into a drama. I had just finished cleaning up some kind of accidental mess with the vacuum when Zachary decided to play "leaf blower" with the vacuum hose, which was all well and good until he swung it down too hard and sent a plume of dirt and dust particles flying all over the living room and into his hair. Oh - and did I fail to mention this was after I had already given him an unexpected shower for some other sticky mess (under protest) that morning?
We really just had to leave the house before mommy lost it completely.
Dogs were let out, sunscreen was applied, camera and masks were grabbed, and we set off in search of some pretty flowers to take pictures of. The car steered itself toward the beach. I had no idea if it was even open.
It was, but without this year's parking pass, we parked almost a mile away and I still wasn't sure we would make it, or if we would encounter too many people along the way. Although prepared to turn around, we were able to walk along a grassy stretch without anyone coming close and once we made it to the beach, there were very few people, all sufficiently spread out. Zachary had a blast in the sand, making a fine mess to his heart's content, and I had a much needed detox and break. The water is so beautiful and calming.
It was the perfect reset button.
My point is that in times like these, we might choose to remember that things aren't always what they seem and we would do well to exercise a little patience with others. We never know what kind of day they're having - regardless of their smile.
I don't need encouragement, validation, pats on the back or anything like that. I just want to tell the truth. I was weary. I'd had enough, was completely worn out and felt like my composure was slipping. There were simply too many things to do and not enough time or nearly enough sleep. I ran into a friend to whom I immediately began spewing out my exasperation. She said I needed a break. I disagreed. "What I NEED, is to get my work done." I was seriously stressed.
I headed home and started racing around like a maniac trying to get a thousand things done in the time it would normally take to do only ten things. After a while I noticed the clock (5:39pm). Evening service would start at 6pm and I had just enough time to get there. ("But all the unfinished work," my brain chided me.) I flipped a coin. (Heads, so off to church I went.)
I arrived just before 6pm and noticed that a whole series of texts mysteriously vanished from my phone as if to say, "forget all about this." (Alright.) During the meditation I thought I might fall apart. I felt tears well up in my eyes as I just sat there quietly and tried to "get in tune with my heart" as the minister instructed. My heart had HAD it. I was running on empty and my heart felt it.
Amazingly and almost instantly I realized an answer. (I didn't even know I had a question!) I was not at the mercy of circumstance. It didn't matter how little time I had or what curve balls came at me. I was not powerless. I would get through. I just knew it. I was certain.
It sounds simple enough, but that little quiet break was exactly what I needed. It really only took a few minutes. I stayed for the whole service anyway, but after five minutes or so of meditation I was good.
So I guess my friend was right. I'm glad I ran into her. I'm grateful for her instruction and for the logistical ability to take that break. It truly did wonders.
